Why women have affairs with married men

Disclaimer!
This is not for the women who interacted with a man believing he was unmarried. This is for the women who either knew upfront he was married or continued the relationship after finding out he was married. Just like the married man himself, no woman is more tempting than his individual choice, every woman can be held accountable to her decision.

In an age of women’s empowerment, ownership of choice, and pursuit of equal rights why do women continue to make themselves available, pursue, and have affairs with married men? Choice usually has two components: intent and benefit. Even when the intent is unconscious and not revealed until later, intent is there. In the area of cheating with a married man the intent can be everything from money, excitement, personal glory, thrill of the challenge, and even feelings of love. Of course there are others more insidious such as intent to harm someone else based on low self-esteem or envy. But when it’s all said and done, women make an individual choice to engage in activities with men who they know are married every single day.

The second part is benefit. Even with all the hurt women have experienced from their husbands, fathers, and friend’s husbands cheating women still continue to be the “other woman”. Logic says with all that hurt caused by the man’s choice women would be working in large numbers to make sure they NEVER said yes to a man with a ring. So there must be a huge upside to doing it. Studies show women find married men more attractive. One article even suggests a possible chemical change in a woman when she overcomes the obstacle of marriage to get her guy. Socially I have heard the benefits include money, power, and generally just getting things she wasn’t getting in her own life.

A third reason comes to mind when explaining human behavior. Because they can. This reason is more perplexing to many of us because it defies logic, rationale, and purposeful decision making. As much as we want to believe we are good natured and above such things many of us still do things simply because we can. The thought of consequences or impact simply isn't a deterrent to doing what feels good at the time.

While I do not claim to know all the factors to why this happens one thing for is for sure. When Beyonce said “you should have put a ring on it” she didn’t mean the one already on his finger.